Feels Like Today

I was talking to Michelle last night (she came to stay with me while Jack was gone to CA for a couple days) and realized why I am actually staying away from Todd. And why it doesn't feel nearly as bad as before, and why I think I'll actually stay away.


I CHOOSE ME. I look at his contact info in Outlook at work, I have his email and phone number memorized and I choose not to use that information. I CHOOSE not to talk to him because I know what it does to me. Hence, I choose me,

And that's why my weight loss has happened. I looked at myself in the mirror one day with a bagel loaded with cream cheese in my hand and I thought, I CHOOSE ME. The food will not win. And so now, I'm a size six rather than a fourteen.

Whenever I make a major choice in my life and choose to value myself, I succeed (or at least feel better). So now, it's a question of applying that elsewhere (without being selfish).

This weekend, instead of waiting for people to come to me, I organized my weekend in about an hour - I asked Kenny if he was doing anything and then planned drinks with him on Friday. Saturday Amanda & I are hanging out and then on Sunday Danielle, Jamie and I are getting together to celebrate that we don't have to work (and watching Grey's Anatomy). Very, very cool.... and I feel like I'm finally turning a corner.