- A candle shaped like a shoe from my mom, which I will probably never use or put in broad daylight (as with most of my mom's presents like that)
- Yankees vs. Twins tickets at Yankee Stadium (I'm going to get beat up, but who cares? It's the TWINS!)
- A diamond necklace (teeny tiny diamonds) that were a giveaway at a magazine party I didn't go to from my roommate (but I was really jealous when she got them, so her snagging them was really nice)
- 3-in-1 shower gel/shampoo/bubble bath collection from Philosophy/Sephora that smell like mimosas, margaritas, and daquiris (and they really do - don't use this stuff when you're hungover!)
- New workout clothes (puma pants, adidas shorts which match my shoes, and a Nike shirt)
Finding out my boyfriend a) was unhappy for most of our relationship, b) didn't like the fact that I smoked, and c) was FINANCIALLY and SOCIALLY a Republican!
So needless to say, Todd & I have broken up. For good. Not only can I not really trust what he says he feels (because obviously he's been lying most of the time we're together), I don't want to be with someone that's not crazy about me. I don't have time for that.
Plus, it's a REALLY bad sign that I dated the man for almost 7 months and didn't know he was a Republican. Wouldn't you think?
So my birthday was TRULY shitty. But I got good gifts, and my Thursday birthday dinner at 107 West was really great.... because then I still thought my boyfriend loved me, my dad was here, and we had great food with my roommate and our key-holders/neighbors Matt & Jess in tow who tried not to be shocked when my father acted out at the restaurant.
Todd & I officially broke up Tuesday night... I was really upset on Sunday, and a little bad on Monday, but I got my feelings out and managed to figure out some the things that I need to remember so that I don't slide back on my diet or sit around the house all day moping:
1. Like I said before, if he wasn't happy, nothing I can do will make him happy.
2. I don't want to waste any more time on someone like that - even if I do love him. (and I still do.)
3. If you don't know yourself, you can't share it. Todd doesn't really know anything about himself, and he's not really up to learning about it.
4. I need someone who is as emotionally available as I am (my most successful relationship, with Kevin, was where we both liked talking about our emotions.)
5. I can't see Todd or speak to him (email is okay) for at least a month to six weeks... and I also can't date or get physically involved with anyone until then (so I need more batteries).
6. This may be denial, but it's all his fault that we stayed together so long. Yes, I was the one campaigning for us to get back together all the time, but he was there. I can only manipulate so far.
7. My parents curse (whenever my parents meet my boyfriend, we break up) is still in effect.
8. This is corny, but I WILL SURVIVE. I have before and I will again.
9. Relationship karma SUCKS.
10. I'm hotter than when I met him, and when I see him again, I will be hotter yet.
2 comments:
HIya Meg. Just read your post about your birthday, and felt so sorry about what happened.
On my birthday 1999 I found out that my wife of one year was sleeping with her old boyfriend. Was hard to think that I could get along with the suppose love of my life.
Well as you can see I am still here and life still went on. I am not trying to give your advice on what to do.
Cause no advice can be nothing more then placing a bandaid for a small cut on the huge gaping wound that has happened to you.
But I can say that there is someone out there for us all. Someone whom feels that we are the bomb.
If you get to read my blog please do. You will see that I too have problems and I too have wonderful experiences.
http://balric99.blogspot.com/
From what you said about your x, he does appear to be very week, he should be more open and blunt with you. However this republican thing, I'm sure you'd ahve known if you asked. Sometimes you have to ask the questions to get the answers. People aren't all so open.
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