When Friendship Hurts

My life sucks.

My boss has become edgy and bitchy as of late; I'm certain no one at work includes me in their reindeer games, and most of all my friends (as I said before about last weekend) are evil.

There are exceptions. Jenn said it best on the phone last night. "You DO have friends. I'm just here." (WI). And she's right. I do - Reid's in Minneapolis, Lori's in Michigan, Josh's in Eau Claire.... but I'm here. And damnit, I'm lonely! I know how Erica & Brandt have been feeling in their respective places now.

Jackie & Todd are also exempt - Jackie because this weekend was the first time she ever let me down (which is the get-out-of-jail-free card) and Todd, other than breaking up with me, which I think was the best thing after all - has been nothing but a friend.

But I'm starting to get mad at Amanda.

So she welcomes me into the fold on Saturday after Jackie didn't call me, then we went to Shade in the Village - and she sat outside on her phone talking to her sister for a half hour. Then she came back in, guzzled the wine, and promptly left me (but not without an "I LOVE YOU!!") and promised to make it up to me on Sunday, since we both had the wonderous holiday weekend.

But then she didn't call. Even after I called her. I got depressed. And then I called Todd and went out with him, and I already told you what happened there.

Then I called Monday to see if she wanted to hang, and she was "too busy with school." Which is a fine & dandy excuse, but it can't be true 24/7, frankly. I know I don't sound understanding, but I don't care. This has been a long time in coming.

To be completely honest, I don't even know if getting mad is worth it. But a hissy tantrum would be a relief. It would be SOOOO nice to just blast the woman who has made me feel, for whatever reason, incompetent.

This whole thing has made me appreciate Todd so much more as a friend. He listens to me or pretends to, is mr. chivalry with his wallet which is not necessary but nice, and I feel bad for blasting him yesterday. Maybe I blasted him just because I know that Amanda won't care if I blast her.

But I'm done for the day. It's time to go to class.

But first: MANAGING ED GUY UPDATE

Yeah, don't think this is going to happen. Went to ICM thing, wasn't there. Two cute ICM guys though - one totally gay was more interesting than straight one.

Don't really want to spend money to hang out with "groovy" indie art dept that makes me feel vastly uncool unless there's a reason to go. And my crush on this boy is certainly not big enough to a) spend money and b) miss an extra credit opportunity in my class which I feel I'll need as many points as possible in to make the grade...

So I choose not. I guess the practice for me with Todd was in vain. But it wasn't totally because I got to see Todd fall with his legs wider than I've ever seen them. It was kinda funny and oddly hot.

Ruminate on THAT.